timehop ramblings

export-32306498

The entire captions reads: “Day 1. New goals. New start. I won’t stop starting until it sticks.”

This was one year ago and I would like to say I am on Day 365 of some grand fitness streak but I am not there. In fact, I am probably pretty much as far from a streak as is possible. BUT, I have not given up. I am still trying to figure out what makes me happiest and what I want and why.

I LOVE walking. (including my walking videos which I really LOVE)

I LOVE yoga (but it has been the only real workout-type activity I have done in months)

I forgot about it, but I do love to lift weights.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was doing PiYo and then I really started to get back into my yoga practice. Once I made my yoga practice a priority, PiYo was no longer something I wanted to continue. It made yoga a workout and I needed to separate the two.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I started blogging many, many moons ago. I started my blog as a place to document my weight loss journey when I first was losing weight and following Weight Watchers. Then I started running and documenting that whole process. Then I got injured and I sort of went radio-silent for a while. Then I had surgery on my knee and ankle and tried documenting the recovery. I started this new chapter of the good ol’blog sometime last year when I realized I was 3 years post surgery and I felt stuck in a mending phase.

My blog has changed names, formats and themes as I have changed and grown over the last 7 years. It is weird but I see a connection between my blog changes and my physical fitness. I stopped being a weight loss blogger. I stopped losing weight. I gained back most of the weight I had lost. I was a runner. Now I am not. I was injured. I had surgery. Now I am not injured.

I would start a blog then second guess myself. Who wants to read my ramblings? Why would I want to write an put them out there? Insecurities and self-doubt reared their ugly heads.

So….

I started this new chapter as a whole new blog so I had a place to explore what truly makes me happy. A place to be Jen. A place to figure it all out.

Jen Goes Zen.

I want to be happy. But more than that, I want to be confident and comfortable with being Jen. With just being me. ALL of me! All of my quirks, all my ups and downs, all my successes and failure.

I want this place to be my place to figure it out.

A journal of sorts.

The good, the bad, the ugly.

And even though, I started it a while ago, I never truly committed to it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I can see a pattern.

Or a cycle.

I am breaking the cycle.

I don’t need to reinvent myself or my blog. I just have to figure out what makes me happy and say and believe that it is enough! That I am enough. I am perfect as I am.

And the world can take me as I am or they can walk away.

BUT I CANNOT WALK AWAY! I need to truly and fully commit to myself and my health and well-being.

I need to remember this every day

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wow!

This became so wordy! I saw that picture yesterday on my TimeHop and it really got me thinking. Each day is a new day and a new start. I want to work on building up good, healthy habits so that I don’t feel like I am starting again and again. So, no more starting. Just doing.

Just being.

Happy.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s